Apology Letter—Definition and Tips to Write a Good One

An apology letter is a formal letter wherein you want to express genuine remorsefulness, addressed to the person who has been offended in a personal or professional context. The letter of apology is usually delivered after an event that has created tension between the parties, with the aim of restoring the relationship. Every good apology letter includes these three elements: a genuine apology, taking responsibility for the matter at hand, and offering a solution on how the damage can be fixed.

How to start a good apology letter

Begin with an honest apology and a straightforward acknowledgment of the event in question, including the consequences the event may have created. The letter of apology may be written on your or someone else’s behalf.

For example:

I am writing to express my sincere apology for my (or my colleague’s) poor presentation at yesterday’s meeting. I’ve realized that my under-preparedness has misrepresented the image of our organization and furthermore influenced our future projects.

How to write a sincere apology letter

After taking responsibility and admitting the consequences of your actions, continue your letter of apology by shifting your and your reader’s focus on making amends. This is a critical point in your letter of apology as it suggests that you have understood the scope of the event and given thought to how the situation can be fixed and a relationship repaired. Make sure to include clear and achievable goals on how you plan to make up for the damage.

For example:

Upon further reflection, I see how my actions may have compromised the integrity of our organization and how they might have a negative impact on our future plans. That is why I have personally reached out to all the members of the committee and scheduled a meeting with them so that our presentation can be delivered as originally planned.

Of course, depending on the content of your apology letter, these steps may vary - but remember: be clear and straightforward in acknowledging your actions and showing a willingness to make amends for the damage.

What to avoid in an apology letter

So far, we have focused on strategies that will make your letter of apology genuine and effective. However, there are several things you should avoid when writing a formal letter of apology.

First, do not try to put the blame on others or justify yourself. What is crucial in your apology letter is to admit and take responsibility for whatever you might have done. This way, the recipient will understand that you are responsible and that you will take action to make amends.

Next, avoid passive-aggressive tones. Statements such as Had you not scheduled the meeting so early, I would’ve had time to prepare better, put the blame on the recipient, and shift the focus of your apology.

Finally, try to be genuine in your apology and do not fall into self-pity. Statements such as I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness do not convey the purpose of your letter and will, again, shift the focus from making amends to self-pity - which you want to avoid in personal as well as in professional relationships.

How to end an apology letter

As you are wrapping up your letter of apology, do not forget to ask for forgiveness and demonstrate your willingness for the relationship to be restored.

For example:

I would like to ask for your forgiveness and would like to reassure you that I will do everything in my power to prevent such future incidents and make amends in our professional relationship.

Formal letter of apology

Dear …

I would like to express my sincere apologies for not consulting you prior to sending the project proposal to our potential business partners. I understand that my decision has been thoughtless and contrary to our original plan, which may result in our project being rejected.

Upon further reflection, I have decided to reach out to our potential partners and schedule another meeting, where I will include your suggestions and make sure that our proposal is delivered according to the original plan.

I do hope that you will accept my apology and that our personal and professional relationship will be restored.

Personal letter of apology example

Dear …

I would like to say that I am so sorry for forgetting to invite you to my birthday party last week. I do understand how this may have hurt your feelings and made you feel unwelcome. The fact is that I forgot that you would be in town, which was inconsiderate of me.

I have given this much thought, and I feel terrible knowing that your feelings are hurt and that this has created tension in our relationship. I would like to apologize for my behavior and invite you to lunch with my family and me this weekend. I really hope that we can talk this through and restore our relationship.

I ask for your forgiveness and promise that I will be more careful and considerate in the future.